Home Sweet (Hot Mess) Home...

It's been brought to my attention that some people (my family, actually. Not my kids but like my extended family) think that I do not care at all what my house looks like. Insert annoyed and slightly shocked face here.

Well I have a little bit of a news flash. . .I literally can not stand messes. Growing up I was always a very organized child (thanks mom) I preferred things clean, nothing out of place slightly obsessed about having everything neat and orderly. That's how I function best. Fast forward to being an adult and getting married to a not so tidy person. . . .then add 6 kids. . . .then add a photography business. Do you want to know what that equals?!?!!! A BIG freaking MESS.

I literally have spent 3 days to a week sometimes where I've done nothing, like not even eat. . . .in my girls room cleaning, re-organizing (Bc this has been organized many times before), throwing out broken toys, donating no longer played with or worn items, putting EVERYTHING in its place. Making it magazine ready. Guess how long it lasts. Like a month maybe. If half of them are away at school for most of the day. Same scenario with my boys room.

Seriously I am beyond thankful for the house we are living in right now. Despite its problems (which are a lot and big ones) I really truly love the house. My husband was born and raised here, my backyard is stunning and perfect for pictures (and huge!) I love the saying "small homes grow tight families" maybe it takes forever for the girls to fall asleep Because all 4 share 1 room but I know when they are grown they will be closer because of that. If they all had their own rooms they wouldn't have to get a long as well and have the bonding time that they do sharing a space. Honestly though, it is really hard to have 8 people in a 3 bedroom 2 bath home with a tiny kitchen. We have a lot of stuff. . . .I totally take the blame for at least half of it because of what I do. I have props for pictures for parties and I also scrapbook. The kids bring home SO MANY papers and artwork, then of course there's mail,bills and laundry for 8 people and the list goes on. It is extremely difficult for me to stay on top of EVERYTHING.

I am COMPLETELY embarrassed to have anyone stop by my house let alone come over and come inside. even when my dad (who is an amazing man) was watching my kids for a few hours last Friday while I worked. I stayed up until 2 am scrubbing my bathroom floor and counter top and cleaning the kitchen Because I didn't want him to see how bad it was. While he was watching them he also cleaned my microwave and moved the couch and had the kids help him clean the living room. Thanks dad xoxo

Sorry this is turning into a whole big long thing I didn't intend for it to. It just makes me feel better to write it all out.

I know to teach my kids to clean up after themselves. Believe me, growing up in my parents home every Thursday was cleaning day. We all had our chores that were above the expected bed making, keeping your room tidy things we had to do. I have tried to teach them to clean up after themselves and that there is a place for everything and everything should be in its place. When you do that you don't lose things and you know exactly where something is when you need it. Can I say though that it's super hard to get that to compute with my kids!? Maybe it's just my kids (I hope not, lol) I will say the older ones obviously help and are better about it than the littlest ones, Understandably.  Ugh.

I started all this to say that I really LOVE a clean and organized house. My hope/plan is to get back to that stage of my life as far as cleaning and organizing goes. Some may think I just don't care. Nothing could be further from the truth, it actually makes me cry that some may think that. How dumb is that for me to cry over what other people think of me.

I will be organized and have the whole house clean and be caught up on the laundry and the dishes, AND have all my pictures edited and delivered and happy clients. . . .BUT I will also not miss playing with my kids when they ask as much as I can. I will read them another book even though the pans from dinner need rinsed and put in the dishwasher. I will hug them a little longer when they need it or I need it instead of folding the laundry. I will cherish the days of their childhood (even the really hard ones when I end up yelling and or crying) because I know for sure that they are fleeting and I will miss them.

I am sorry to anyone who comes over. . . .I really do try to clean up at least the rooms that you will be in for sure or the rooms my clients have to walk through to get to my backyard. Especially because I've been to many of your homes (which so many of you have such amazing and beautiful homes!) and am blown away at how beautiful and clean they are! I wish I was better at keeping on top of my to do lists and keeping my house clean.

All that to say. . . .I actually do care what my home looks like. . . it's just hard to keep it the way I want it with out missing out on time with my kids, or delivering pictures slower, or throwing everything in the trash. Which crosses my mind a hundred times a day.